“On Tyranny” - Chapter 12: "Make eye contact and small talk"

February 24, 2025

If Snyder’s earlier chapters were of a more intellectual bent, here he begins with an embodied approach to what we can do on a daily basis.

The emphasis in this chapter is on appraising one’s psychological landscape and determining who is trustworthy, but I’d like to add two more ingredients to the mix.

One, our day-to-day pleasantries serve to share bonds with everyone we meet, even those who might otherwise wish us ill online or on forums, and possibly, even in life, were public denunciations or tribunals to come to pass. Politesse is not merely polite. It can, as Snyder points out, be a political tool; but prior to that, these moments of being-with-others are intimate in a way that we rarely, if ever, take into consideration.

If we are kind to one another, open to however small a degree, there is an exchange of appreciation, and perhaps, of power. If you are met with acceptance, then it’s the power of forging an alliance; if not, then, the power resides with you. There is no weakness in being open.

Two, looking someone in the eye and offering up kindness toward them is a strength; it communicates that you’re not afraid, not so much of them specifically, but to be kind, to reveal yourself as you are and by doing so, signaling that you accept others the same way.

Snyder says as much when he writes that making eye contact and small talk ‘is a part of being a citizen and a responsible member of society. It is also a way to stay in touch with your surroundings, break down social barriers, and understand whom you should and should not trust. If we enter a culture denunciation, you will want to know the psychological landscape of your daily life.”

He also points out the repercussions of what people remember of how they were treated by their neighbors and associates, and sometimes, friends, under oppressive regimes. Whether it was 1920s Italy, Nazi Germany, the Soviet Union in 1937-1938, or during the communist purges in Eastern Europe in the 40s and 50s, behaviors mattered. “A smile, a handshake, or a word of greeting — banal gestures in a normal situation — took on great significance. When friends, colleagues, and acquaintances looked away or crossed the street to avoid contact, fear grew.”

Snyder point out the uncertainty of who in the United States, “today or tomorrow” feels threatened, but it’s reasonable to assume that many already are. There are three points he makes that bear keeping in mind:

“If you affirm everyone, you can be sure that certain people will feel better.”

After pointing out that people who have survived living under tyrannical regimes developed a sense of who could they trust, he adds, “Having old friends is the politics of last resort.”

The corrective? “[M]aking new [friends] is the first step toward change.”

It is this last statement that bears review. Already, communities, virtual and in real life, are growing and establishing connections. Recently, there have been public expressions, in the form of demonstrations and protests against the regime, as well as constituents confronting their representatives who support the regime happening with greater frequency.

The human spirit thrives on connection, genuine connection. Those of us who have come out of natural disasters or extreme events, discover who “the helpers” are. We ourselves are at our best when we assume that role. It can all start with a glance, a smile, or a quiet exchange.

Snyder, Timothy. On Tyranny - Twenty Lessons from the Twentieth Century. Crown Publishing. New York. 2017..

I don’t have to add a lot here in terms of what we will likely be called on to do. You will read, again and again, how important it is to contact your reps, to volunteer your time, to march in protest, and to help where you can/as you can.

Two places to start with:

Mobilize at https://www.mobilize.us/. I have the landing page set to my area; populated with events, petitions, and volunteer opportunities, it’s practically one-stop shopping.

Indivisible at https://indivisible.org/ is another comprehensive hub. You can sign up for updates, download their guide to organizaing, find candidates to support, and more.

If you don't have a copy of "On Tyranny", you can purchase one here:

"On Tyranny" at Timothy Snyder's website where he lists several options. Support local bookstores and buy local or check it out from your local library.

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Introduction and Chapter 1